Marriage means many different things, to many different people. It can be difficult to find a universally applicable, true meaning of what marriage is. There are so many differing viewpoints on this subject and people often disagree about what marriage means to them.
For example, the Oxford Dictionary definition of marriage is, “The legally or formally recognized union of two people as partners in a personal relationship.” However, in a biblical sense marriage is often defined as, “A man shall leave his father and mother… and hold fast his wife… they shall become one flesh.”
Christians often view marriage as a Holy Covenant before God. It seems that the understanding that two people become one unit, pledging their love for each other, is the general consensus across most believers.
It could therefore be argued that most people would buy into the fact that marriage is the sharing of two lives, bonding their spirits, bodies and souls in union. This article will explore five different definitions of what a marriage could mean, in the endeavor to move towards a more cohesive definition of marriage.
Marriage means to be in agreement.
In the modern world it is usually acknowledged that in order to enter the bonds of Holy Matrimony, both parties involved must be in agreement. Surely, in order to go on a life-long journey together, both people must have agreed to do so.
In the past, or currently in some belief systems, this agreement was often made by the family members of the happy couple. However, nowadays it is generally agreed that the two people who are to become married, decide this for themselves.
This normally follows the structure of one member of the couple asking the question, “Will you marry me?” If an answer is given in the affirmative, planning the marriage (and the wedding) will go ahead.
Once two people have decided that marriage is for them, they have to decide upon what their true meaning of marriage is. Often the couple will discuss the topic of what legal marriage contract they will use. Other important agreements involve whether to have children, if so, what faith to raise the children and what marriage means to them as a couple.
Marriage should mean letting go of selfishness.
It has been discussed that marriage is the joining of two people, therefore it goes without saying that there will need to be some level of compromise. Once you get married there is no more ‘I’, it’s all about ‘we’. As a single person you may have been able to do whatever you fancied, to come and go as you pleased, but once you are married, there is another person you need to take into consideration. You need to think about what makes them happy and use this when you are making plans.
The best marriages are often those where both partners are wholly committed to making their other half happy. In a marriage, often this is a priority and by letting go of selfishness and prioritizing your partner you can truly get the best out of a marriage.
Read the following tips to keep your marriage private
YOUR SPOUSE’S SEXUAL STRUGGLES
If your husband doesn’t last long in bed or his penis loses erection quickly, if your wife has an unpleasant smell or she struggles to do some sex positions; don’t expose him/her to your friends or someone who you are flirting with in bid to justify why you are flirting. The sexual struggles in your marriage should be kept a secret as you both feel safe seeking solutions together
THE SWEETEST PART ABOUT YOUR SEX LIFE
If the sex in your marriage is incredible, don’t go around sharing all the details; not because you are afraid your friends will want to steal your sexually amazing spouse, but because some things are best kept special by being kept secret just between you two. Others may know your spouse is great in bed, but they don’t need to know the details of how great. Your love making is not for their entertainment
YOUR SPOUSE’S SALARY
Be careful especially when sharing this information with your family members; they might want to take advantage of your spouse if he/she earns alot or look down on your spouse if he/she earns less or nothing at the moment. You two know how much you bring to the family basket and know your limit on how engaged you want to be in supporting your relatives
WHAT YOU HAVE DONE FOR YOUR SPOUSE
Have you bought your spouse a car, have you given your spouse capital to start a business, have you paid your spouse’s University education fees, have you bought your spouse an expensive gift or clothes?; don’t go informing people about it. By doing good to your spouse, you did it for you because you two are one. If it came from your heart, you will not go bragging about it
YOUR SPOUSE’S PAST
If your spouse had a dark past; maybe your spouse made bad romantic choices in the past, procured an abortion, was sexually abused, was in a dishonourable profession; it is not your place to disclose this to people.
